![]() Now it does not include sharing the same bed, but it does include supporting him in his recovery once he is ready for it. So our love remains as strong as ever but our way of showing it changes. Our love of our partner does not permit us to enable him to go on destroying himself and others. Our love of ourselves does not permit placing our and our children’s safety, health, and happiness in jeopardy. There are boundaries in the topography of love, but no barriers.Īs an example, we can love our alcoholic spouse but as long as he is abusive and refuses to seek help, we cannot live with him. We can be careful about our boundaries when others come close but boundary-less in how far our love extends. This makes sense but only in how we love not that we love. Selectivity is important for our safety and security because it means trusting only those who have proven their trustworthiness. It is, of course, true that discrimination in trusting others is necessary if we are to have quality relationships. Would we be able to repeat the sentence above substituting love for honesty? It will sound like this: We have no trouble being committed to being loving toward everyone, unconditionally and unilaterally, across the board, no matter how unloving others may choose to be. We believe everyone is deserving of honesty, but we imagine that only certain selected people deserve our love. ![]() But we think of love as having to be carefully meted out and promised only to very special people in our lives. Here we see a contradiction in ourselves: We have no trouble being committed to honesty toward everyone, unconditionally and unilaterally, across the board, no matter how dishonest others may choose to be. We are usually selective about showing love. (There is no conditional love that is not love at all, only a response to our approvability or to our being pleasing.) This helps us become unconditional in our love. We become reckless when we are so firm and focused in our intention that we are no longer held back by what might be threatening. Loving is often scary so we have to become reckless in practicing it. ![]() Since love sits in us between trust and fear, a commitment to love requires daring to trust and freedom from fear, both risks we are willing to take when we love someone. 19% of respondents reported a ‘Greater focus on talent retention strategies’ (e.g.Does Love Have to Be Choosy? David Richo, Ph.D., MFT.More importantly, the report polled companies on the impact this talent crunch is having on their recruitment and human resource strategies– and what organisations are doing to address this issue. All the firms surveyed were given three workforce solutions to choose from and these are the findings: 20% of companies reported that they simply received ‘No response to job advertisements’.23% of respondents said that ‘Singaporeans are demanding too high salaries’.The majority of 45% claim that ‘Singaporeans are too choosy’ when it comes to the nature of work, working conditions and hours, workplace location, etc. ![]() There were three main reasons for their predicament: ![]() In total, 236 companies reported difficulty in finding Singaporeans to fill positions. Here's more from Hiring Trends Report 2012: The government has since implemented a number of measures aimed at reducing the number of foreigners that companies can hire in order to encourage them to hire Singaporeans instead. 1 in 2 companies claim the Singaporeans are choosy when it comes to work.Īccording to Achieve Group's Hiring Trends Report 2012, there has been much debate on the hiring of foreign talent instead of Singaporeans ever since the hot button issue surfaced during the General Elections in 2011. ![]()
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